going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
