My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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