Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
why do cheetos always look like penises
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
