Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
