Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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