i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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