I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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