You're so nebulous sometimes
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
