put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
