oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Randomize
