this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
