problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
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