I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize