hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
