Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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