Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
