p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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