UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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