He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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