He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize