you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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