Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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