I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Your dad touched me again.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
