I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
