Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
