It's like God shit irony all over that family
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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