he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
she woke up with a sticky ear
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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