Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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