she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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