No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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