I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Randomize
