i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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