Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
