i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
