Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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