is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
