I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
