1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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