Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
