Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
