Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i jhust puked up my retainher.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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