So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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