I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
