Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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