well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize