Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
