so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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