My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Apparently you make a good broom.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
