I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
