she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
