New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
