hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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